God, what was wrong with him? Why in the name of all that’s unholy did he do that? Why the fuck would he save the Slayer’s life? Especially after it was his plan that was gonna end it. His hard work had finally paid off and the Slayer was gonna be dead and he would be free to return to Dru. Spike paced around the upper level of his crypt. But did he want her dead? No, he realised, he didn’t. In fact that was the last thing he wanted! But why? Why did he care that this girl, this slight, beautiful, amazing, vibrant slayer, live?
Shit, where did that come from? The Slayer, beautiful? Well, yeah, he conceded. Course she was, an’ he knew it… he had eyes didn’t he? First time he’d seen her she was dancing; wiggling that hot little body all over the place, getting him, and probably half the male population of The Bronze, hard. But he wasn’t supposed to think about the Slayer like that. He was a vampire. He KILLED slayers, that’s what he did. Not think about how that warm, petite body would feel against his. Not care if that fire, that incredible life and vibrancy was extinguished. It was his job to do the bloody extinguishing!
He threw himself down into his chair, his head tipped back as he drew a long steadying breath. He thought about all the times he had fought her, all the times he had failed to kill her, and he wondered if deep down inside had he NOT wanted to kill her. Is that why he had failed every time? He thought about what Dru had said to him that first night he’d fought the Slayer and lost; she’d told him he had left her for the Slayer. He had, of course, thought she was off her bloody tree; accusing him of not loving her, of giving his heart to the Slayer. He remembered, also, the gut wrenching terror when he had thought the silly bint was going to die. The concern he’d felt when he came back to her and saw her leaning exhausted against the tomb. He smiled in recollection of her courage as she’d tried to muster up the strength to fight him when she thought he was coming back to finish her off. He remembered the hurt that had flickered through him when he’d realised that she thought he was going to kill her. How he’d made every effort to let her know he wasn’t gonna harm her. How the thought of letting her go off home by herself when she was clearly so exhausted that she couldn’t have fought off a fledgling had terrified him. His anger when he realised she was shirking her training and that she had nearly paid for that neglect with her life. Stupid little bint, it wasn’t fun learning how to sense vampires, well tough bloody shit! Idiot girl, maybe now she would understand that it was important? That paying attention to her training could save her stupid life.
Why was he feeling so protective of a human, a slayer? What was wrong
with him? Closing his eyes, he figured the best thing he could do
was get some sleep, time enough to worry about it later when he wasn’t
so bloody tired. As his eyes drifted closed he saw her; her smile
flashing, green eyes burning with fire. A golden vision shining in
the moonlight; spinning, leaping, kicking and punching, each move
flowed seamlessly into the next as she danced. God, she was beautiful
when she fought. He’d loved watching her. Could’ve watched
her all night, he mused. But then fighting at her side had been amazing
“Hap... Happening?” She looked hazy for a second. “Oh, nothing...”
“So you wanna hang at the Bronze tonight? Angel might be there!” Willow bubbled as Xander glared in her direction, his stock standard response to any mention of Buffy’s vampire honey.
“Huh, oh … I dunno guys, I just, ah…” Buffy’s eyes grew distant like she had forgotten they were there.
Her friends noticed she was withdrawn and when they queried her about it she told them absently that she was just tired. She was tired, so not really with the avoidy there, right?
That afternoon when she joined her watcher in the library for training
she asked him if there was any way they could work on her slayer sense
thingy. Giles was very enthusiastic and assured her that they would
start work on it that night; he would join her for patrol, which he
said would be pleasant as he had not joined her in a patrol for a
while now. Yeah, pleasant, Buffy thought… goody!